July 28, 2019

On norms…

By In Mindset

Why be normal when you can be interesting.

My daughter is ten, entering middle school this year, and has declared herself weird. The funny thing is, she wears this title like a badge of honor. She is proud of her weirdness. As far as I know, no one is calling her weird (except maybe her brother), she just sees the value in being uniquely her own and I for one LOVE IT. 

I feel like the only people I can call “normal” are the ones I don’t know very well. You know the people, the ones you follow on social media that look like they have it all together. Anyone I know well has a million idiosyncrasies and things about them that are weird, aka interesting. Because let’s face it, normal is boring. 

Normal is the standard, the average. Normal means conforming. It means ordinary. Blah. Boring. Do you know what the thesaurus says are antonyms for normal? Different. Extraordinary. Rare. Exceptional. Hmmm. Which would you rather be? 

It’s crazy how much energy we can put into feeling and looking “normal.” We try to keep up with the status quo, which by the way is everyone’s fake version of perfect. I love a beautiful Instagram page as much as anyone, with the matching wardrobes, lipstick on point, perfectly manicured backdrop, and doll-like children who are not only clean but smiling on cue! It’s beautiful but it is certainly not the norm. Yet because it appears perfect, we think it is the standard we need to keep up to. Stop it. 

There is no normal. No two humans are the same so how can we even define what normal looks like. There are 7.7 BILLION versions of normal in the world because what feels like my standard is certainly not the standard of every other person on this earth. My typical day is not yours. My personality is not yours. The scar on my forehead is not yours. And I know you have a million cool things about you that are not mine. 

And thank the Lord for that! How tiring would it be to wake up every day and go to work with people who were just like you? What if your friends shared stories of their life and it sounded the same as yours? Imagine your spouse coming home and saying, “how was your day honey,” and your reply was, “just like yours.” The repetition would kill you, literally! How would the world even stay functional without each person having their own passion and place?!

It wouldn’t. And I wouldn’t want it to. I am encouraging my daughter to stay weird. In fact, I tell her she gets it from me. I need her to know now, before weird becomes uncool in her eyes, that her uniqueness makes her interesting and amazing and special. And that the norm really means nothing at all. 

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